Dear Son of Neptune:
first of all, get your head out of your ass, or the bong as it were. Next find out which of your stoner buds just got a new car and do something really mean to him. REALLY MEAN! make him smoke up some oregano or something. That being said, I think most swim team locker rooms smell faintly like marijuana, Ben Gay, and chlorine. That's how mine always smelled anyway.
When you're in the pool swimming back and forth and back and forth FOREVER, it does get a little dull, and SOME swimmers were known to help the Pink Floyd playing in their minds a little by a tiny bit of zee reefer. That's what I heard, anyway. As far as I know, this practice does not necessarily lead to an end stage of snorting heroin off of a baby's ass while getting a swastika tattoo and committing armed robbery at the local White Hen.
So get your ass back in the pool, wait for some new endorsements (Cartoon Network and Cheetos, probably). And please have your aorta checked because I'm pretty sure that you have Marfan's syndrome and will bleed out before you're 30.
All my Bestest.
Love, Chico's Catalog
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