Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Hagetha/bad hair

Let's face it, sometimes a brown paper bag is the best accessory. It's cheap, eco-friendly and covers a myriad of flaws. Just cut out some eye holes, slap it on, and off you go; no need to even touch up the lipstick. It can be problematic though, say if you want to go to the bank or get on a train. It may also degrade in a heavy rain. This is why I have opted instead for hubcap sized sunglasses and a ball cap. Why shield my disarming good looks, you're wondering? Well it's just the next chapter in the never ending hair drama.

My latest cut: The wannabe Katie Holmes after Katie got her wannabe Posh Spice cut. Katie probably just got the shorter cut so she could look a little mannish for her little twink Tommy. Posh was probably going short to demonstrate sympathy for beleaguered baldy Brittney who removed all her body hair, most likely to foil drug testing attempts.

This train of thought is the unfortunate result of me reading the waiting room magazines. Today I look exactly like Katie Holmes except not brunette, not tall, and not beautiful...whoops, I'm headed right back to the paper sack. The color looks good at least. Well, it looks good to me; apparently there is a large spot in the back that I missed during my recent home touch-up, but since I can't see it it really isn't bothering me.

Fortunately, amid the latest hair crisis, my weight status has been downgraded from eminent obese blow-out to scarecrow. All within a 3 day period. Why is it that although Nick's the crazy nutball, I'm the one who will ultimately end up medicated?

Nick Nicety (currently an optional exercise): good hair.

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